Saturday Cringeringeringishinglycringershire

I have an infatuation with illiteration. Since we’re all just making things up. 

I purposed to my girlfriend. (so I am guessing it wasn’t an accident, huh.)

I am defiantly not hungry. (you little rebel, you.)

I’m going irregardless of how you feel about it. (what’s worse than having no regard? having irregard. It’s like regardless…… but even less than that. You’ve dipped into the black hole of regard where you are now in the negative space of regard. Irregard sounds like an exotic vegetable.)

He was my night and shining armor. (He was of dark complexion and shaped like a shield.)

I put it over their. (over their what? Over THEIR. Their WHAT, though? THEIR. WHO???? FINISH THE SENTENCE!!!!!)

I wanted to go expect i’m not aloud to.  (I expected it to be a lot quieter in here.)

I can’t except that. (I can’t, either.)

That was so bazaar. (I do not think that word means what you think it means.)

Of coarse you can have some. (What’s the main course? English. English is the main course.)

I want to insure it doesn’t happen again. (But how much is it going to cost to do it?)

I don’t want to loose you as a friend. (Tighten up!! It’s slipping! Our friendship is too loose!)

Your out of control. (My out-of-control WHAT?)

Bare with me. (at this nude beach. I can’t. I can’t. lol)

We colored with crowns. (and scratched the everliving fuck out of them. Good job, they’re ruined)

The skies the limit. (The skies. The limit. Painfully poetic.)

Nip it in the butt. (Sounds kinky.)

For all intensive purposes. (Such vigor.)

I’ll take another expresso. (Because espressos are just too damn slow for me.)

He got off scotch free. (Don’t worry, i’m not much of a whiskey fan, either.)

I did a complete 360. I’m a changed man. (You’re actually right back where you started, fam.)

This is are life and I just wish you would stay out of it. (Are Life. Sounds like a brand.)

He supposably didn’t get the message. (Idek)

I could care less. (Do it.)

I could continue but it never ends. I have to go, now.

 

 

 

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